Today is the 1st of November, and all around the world, cows and chickens and pigs and even some of the meatier frogs assembled in their covert banquet halls and expo centers to behold on big screens the sacred but widely televised bark- and berry-eating ceremony performed in the Great Chaco rainforest by indigenous deer and jaguar and armadillo in grass skirts wearing crowns of Cock’s Comb blooms while dancing and singing and wildly carousing about in honor of World Vegan Day.
Oh, the gatherings were reportedly a sight to behold. The sounds and smells. The lip syncing competitions and games of pin the head on the Romneys. And the best part of it all, there was very, very little meat eating being done (and that which was was only going on in the various and very exclusive chimpanze rooms.)
How did YOU celebrate World Vegan Day? You certainly weren’t expected to attend any of the aforementioned parties, but, did you hug a vegan today? Did you thank a vegan for his service? Did you at least eat a veggie burger???
That’s what I was up to today. Creating delightenment…one less bite out of a big ol’ juicy, savory T-bone steak at a time. And just like that, I’m changing the world.
If you missed out today, a little later this month is World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims.
Okay, really. Why would I make that up?